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This
season has come and gone leaving us with warm thoughts and good memories. We
had a more modest holiday this year, as I decided beforehand not to overindulge
in spending. I went shopping for my wife only, and left the rest to her, she
does a much better job of it than I do with my once a year binge shopping
sprees.
I
purchased one of Dave Ramsey’s packages for my oldest son, which consisted of a
book and a couple of videos to try and show him some of the better ways to
handle his money, something which I so obviously failed to teach him as he was
growing up. It’s the American way, debt, promissory notes, and credit cards.
It’s a mistake that I truly regret as I see him follow in my footsteps,
borrowing to obtain the things he wants now, and little or no savings. When I
talk to him about how we have to pay over time for what we are getting on
credit anyway, only triple or quadruple the price for the added interest, sort
of like a backward savings account, he understands that it would just be wiser
to save up the money for the purchase.
I
bought myself a pair of work boots to replace the two-year-old ones that were
beginning to let the water in. Funny how you only notice when it’s wintertime.
All of the items I purchased this year were bought with cash, as I was blessed with monetary gifts this year from three different people. I did buy gift envelopes
though, and gave most of the money away in lieu of extravagant gifts to my
immediate family members. This coupled with their smaller, more humble, presents
that their Mama bought them seemed more appropriate than my usual way of doing
things. She is so much better at getting them what they need instead of
what may be a passing fancy.
Say
what you want about monetary gifts being the lazy persons way of avoiding
having to put thought, effort, and time into gift buying, I battled internally
with my own thoughts about gift giving, and the fact that I had already
verbally communicated the need to having a frugal, scaled down Christmas. I
struggled with the idea of putting the cash toward my goal of savings and
getting out of debt, but the words kept coming back to haunt me, “Give, and
it shall be given unto you, pressed down, shaken together, and running over”.
So, I gave freely, with no stipulations on how they should use it. Mind you, I
put these money gifts under the tree, and I put bows on them, and I included them in
the gift packages that they already had, and then I took them out. I removed
the fancy bows, and I put them away. Not wanting this to be a part of
Christmas, or to take anything away from the customary gift exchange on
Christmas Eve, I gave them these gifts the next day, almost failing to give my
beautiful wife her envelope on Christmas day as it was almost midnight when I
handed it to her. Seems to me that there was a lot of thought and work going
into this. I’m not saying this is the best way, nor is it for everyone, but it
certainly relieved some of the pressure off of my family, as my oldest had
already expressed his desire to scale back this year on buying so many gifts,
and I echoed his protest, and fully intended to follow through with our
commitment to a smaller, simpler, and yes, cheaper, way of doing things.
The
actions that I took this year were reciprocal, and I relaxed in the knowledge
that poor people were not struggling to buy me several things, which they
really could not afford. I did not do the usual gift opening at the in-laws,
which requires pretty faces, and awkward hugs for sometimes novelty items that
are mostly useless, or hearty thanks for clothing that would fit Sasquatch.
They did send two gifts for me, both of which I’m wearing.
Kay
cooked a wonderful Christmas dinner with all the trimmings. My oldest and his
family came over and we enjoyed the opening of a few gifts for his babies, and
one each between us.My Mama was here,
and my benevolent sister Lotus, and in addition to her other gifts, she brought
us some really nice curtains which flatter my office much more than the ones
that I already had, but she had to stay late to sew some modifications on the
back to fit the curtain rod. With Lydia’s help from a well timed phone call,
the sewing machine that we thought was useless all these years was fixed
(another impulse buy), that was her gift to us, and the curtains are up, and
nice, if I may say so myself. There are no pictures this year, as I took a
total turnaround from the usual, and decided to forego the amateur photography
and backside profiles of gift giving, so, you folks have something to be
thankful for also.
We
have much to be thankful for, and we are blessed to have family that we love,
and we know what the true meaning of traditional Christmas is, it is about
caring. This is our Christmas.
May
God bless you all with a healthy and prosperous new year.
I have just passed another milestone, my ninth year anniversary on my
present job. There was no fanfare, no bells, whistles, or confetti, not
even an acknowledgment of a goal seldom reached in the notoriously
revolving door of the hospitality business.
In my young and restless days, I would have strongly considered moving on
after five, so, how did this happen? Maturity, you say? Complacency?
Losing sight of a vision of always moving up and onward? I can tell you
now, those restless feelings are still there, but somehow, somewhere,
they are reshuffled to the back of the deck, to make room for the
different hand that has, more recently, been dealt. Impulse gives way
to reason, and desire yields to necessity.
If there is one bit of advice I have for the new generation, it is to make the most of the
spontaneity and vigor with which you envision life's challenges and
crossroads, for these are the moments that will define you as you
approach that "oh, so far off middle age".
Seldom is life so generous as to give you that second chance, which is in us all, to
start anew, and if by circumstance we do, we are not the same. There is
no fearless desire to run naked through the woods (although I've done
it a time or two at far, far, too old), there is no expediency to being
number one in the crowd. There is no longer "Me" and "Now". There is
however a different kind of boldness. I am not afraid of things that go
bump in the night. No longer do I fear hunger, or illness, or
unemployment, nor despair, because I have been visited by all these
things, and I have endured, and I know there will be tomorrow.
With our increasing age comes our greatest strength, and this is experience,
and the wisdom to pass it along to our children, and to theirs. In this
day and age there are many who may contemplate that there is no God,
or, there must be many Gods, but now, more than ever, I can fervently
say, and without a doubt, God bless my children, and keep them from
harms way, for where I lead them, they will follow.
-----byron c.
The
direst foe of courage is the fear itself, not the object of it, and the
man who can overcome his own terror is a hero and more.
- -- George MacDonald
"Go placidly amid the noise & haste & remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly & clearly; and listen to others, even the dull & ignorant; they too have their story. Avoid loud & aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain & bitter; for always there will be greater & lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself. Especially do not fein affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity & disenchantment it is perennial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue & loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a Child of the Universe, no less than the trees & the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the Universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors & aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul. With all its sham, drudgery & broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy." -Max Ehrmann ["Desiderata"]
